Gay Dance - Poco Poco

Amriz Arifin - Madu

This song is dedicated especially to all beloved VG Members and all the gays out there. Enjoy it!!!

p/s: Amriz is so HOOOTTTTT!!!!! His voice makes me melt~

Old Chick Still Rules!!

How to fuck a guy

Learn about the arse

You might think that fucking a guy is pretty straight forward, but if you want to be a great ‘top’ (the guy doing the fucking) it helps to know how the arse works. So before you start banging away, try reading our Know your arse section. Once you know how the different muscles and shapes inside the arse work, you can get a better idea of how to fuck.

Foreplay

Unless a guy is relaxed and ready, fucking his arse might be a little painful. Taking the time for foreplay will make fucking much more comfortable. This can include rimming, gentle fingering, lubrication, patience and listening to each other and responding appropriately.

Find out what he likes

Being a top isn't about being dominant. It's true that some guys like to be dominated but not everyone does. Don't just charge in there. If you ask him how he likes to be fucked you can try and fulfil his request, if you like the sound of it. Listen to his reactions too. If he is making noises that suggest he's in pain, try to move more slowly. Most guys like a change in rhythm now and then so variation is good but if he's screaming with joy, keep doing what you're doing!

Getting hard

The first time you fuck someone, you may be a little anxious. This can sometimes make your erection less hard than usual. Remember to relax - you're both there to enjoy yourself. If you have problems with your erection just concentrate on something else, like kissing, for a while. It can also help if you ask the guy you’re having sex with to do something you like, whether it’s sucking your cock or playing with your nipples. See our section on Erection Problems for more details.

Lube

Using plenty of lube will make fucking easier and safer. Use water-based or silicon-based lubricant if you are using latex condoms (oil based lube can break them). Avoid using any lube with Nonoxynol 9 in it as it can irritate the lining of his arse, and this can make transmission of HIV easier. There is more information on which lubes to use in the HIV & AIDS section of this site.

Positions

Different guys like different positions so it’s worth experimenting. If you've been fucked, you can think about what you enjoyed and try that out on the guy you want to fuck. Not everyone is the same but it's a good place to start. Any position where his knees are bent and drawn into his chest (whether he is kneeling, lying on his back or on his side) will probably lead to a more comfortable fuck. This position will allow smoother entry to the arse.

Once you’ve got the hang of that you may want to change and try something else. This will help your cock to stimulate different parts of his arse, giving new sensations. Remember to listen to his reactions or ask him if he likes it. Some positions may be uncomfortable for you or him.

Tops at risk

Remember that the guy doing the fucking can be at risk of getting HIV. Anal mucus that lines the arse (we all have it) can contain a very high concentration of HIV . The mucous membrane just inside the tip of the penis and the foreskin can absorb liquids, like anal mucus, directly into the bloodstream. So if you fuck a guy’s arse without condoms, any HIV in his anal mucus could enter your body through the end of your cock. Using condoms and water-based or silicon-based lube for fucking will help protect you and your partner from HIV and other STIs.

How to give a blowjob (suck his cock)

Sucking cock is a core sexual activity for most gay men but different men like different things. Some like lots of activity around the head of their cock, others find the head too sensitive and prefer work along the shaft of the penis. Some men don't enjoy deep-throating and more men than you may think aren't keen on receiving blowjobs at all. Ask your partner what he likes and doesn't like; if you're too shy to ask you'll have to try to interpret his groans.

Men tend to be quite visual – they like looking at what's going on to help get them turned on – so give them a chance to see what you're up to down there. A good blow job doesn't only involve the cock, there are plenty of other sexually sensitive areas close by, his balls and ball sack for example, so try licking those too.

While some guys just want rhythmic pumping on the end of their cock, many of us like a bit of variation. By alternation the amount and speed at which you suck or lick, there are hundreds of combinations you can come up with! You can also alternate hot and cold sensations by rinsing your mouth with a warm drink and iced water in turn.

One way to vary your technique (and to give your jaw a rest) is to use your hands. Here are two tricks to add to your repertoire:

The Cock Pull

For direct attention to the dick – but only in one direction. Saliva may be enough for this dependant on the situation but the addition of a favourite lube could be a boon. Starting at the base of the dick, slide a hand up towards the tip, placing the other hand at the base. Just before the first hand comes off the tip of his dick, start the other hand moving up from the base to the tip. Keep the base to tip sliding with alternate hands up and try getting faster & faster. This works really well with a rock hard dick (his), and it's also a great trick on a bloke who's not hard yet or has problems getting hard (works miracles apparently). Of course you can go the other way if you have a hard dick in your hands – or use a combination of the two.

The Drum

Remember that some blokes don't like having their balls played with so only try this on 'ball friendly' shags. Gently wrap a thumb and index finger around his balls to pull them gently away from his body, until you have a sort of 'surface tension' on the bit of his scrotum furthest away from him. Then, starting gently, run your tongue in a circle around this 'end' area. You'll know when you are getting it right from his reaction. It won't (or rarely will should I say) bring most blokes off, but it feels pretty damn good. If he likes that try using a fingertip on the same area.

Giving a good BJ (blowjob) without gagging is a skill that we aren't born with, we have to learn. Here are some tips that could help you:

1. Alcohol tightens the throat muscles so it's best to avoid it (especially spirits) if you want to relax your throat.
2. Drinking orange juice can suppress the gag reflex. If you feel like you're going to gag when you've got a cock in your mouth – swallow. Don't worry, it won't go down.
3. Breathe through your nose. Exhale before taking his cock in your mouth. It will increase your oral capacity by about 33 percent.
4. Flatten your tongue. Say "mmm" or "aaah" to relax your mouth beforehand (you may want to do this quietly or he'll probably think you're a bit weird).
5. Take the cock into your mouth slowly and allow your throat to relax around it. If he tries to force it in, you'll gag for sure.
6. You'll find it easier if you have plenty of saliva. If your mouth feels dry have a glass of water handy.
7. Don't just use your mouth, use your hand as well. You can use your hand as a stopper to ensure that you control the amount of cock you take, as an improvised cock ring to keep him really hard, to wank him as you work him, or to play with his balls, arsehole, nipples or perineum.

Giving someone a blowjob is fairly low risk for HIV. You can reduce the risk even further by avoiding getting cum in your mouth – there are probably only a very few cases where someone has caught HIV without ejaculation into the mouth. It's more likely that you would pick up another STI, such as chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis or herpes, so it's worth getting regular sexual health check-ups. If you wanted to reduce the risk even more, you'd have to use condoms when you suck cock.

How to Support the Gay Community

The gay community is a vibrant and valued part of society. Support for this community is crucial in preventing discrimination, victimization and exploitation of its members. There are a myriad of ways for a motivated individual to stand up for this unique population.



Instructions

1. Step 1

   Attend rallies and meetings to support the gay community. A great way to start is by attending a Gay Pride parade or a local rally supporting gay marriage.

2. Step 2

   Sign a petition to support a gay community cause. For a particular concern close to your heart you might want to consider starting your own petition and distributing it throughout your community to gain as many signatures as possible.

3. Step 3

   Support businesses owned and/or operated by members of the gay community by frequenting them. Also patron businesses known to be gay-friendly and let them know you appreciate their stance and presence in the neighborhood. At LambdaBusiness.com you can find a gay business directory (see Resources below).

4. Step 4

   Vote for political measures supporting gay community concerns and vote against those aimed at limiting gay rights. Write your congressman to let him/her know where you stand on the issues involving the gay community. "The Gay and Lesbian Alliance against Defamation" provides a lot of information on current political activity (see Resources below).

5. Step 5

   Show your support for gay sports stars by attending their events and rooting for them. You may want to write to their sponsors and let them know you appreciate their support for gay athletes by buying their products.

6. Step 6

   Demonstrate your support of the gay artist community. Go to "gay positive" theater showings, read gay oriented books and magazines and patron galleries featuring objects of art created by gay artists.

7. Step 7

   Create a blog in which you write about the gay community, and speak out on web forums dedicated to gay interests. Submit your writings on gay issues to search engines to gain readership.

8. Step 8

   Volunteer your time and/or donate money to the gay community. Seek out local organizations in need of helpers. Let them know what special skills you have and allow them to assign you appropriate tasks. One place in which you could begin your search is via the organization Parents, Families of Lesbians and Gays (see Resources below).

Gay Chinese~ Wow~

China daily has an interview of two gay men and a lesbian that also features a big, bold picture of two young men kissing in Beijing. The first story of a 57 year old married man caught our attention:

Tong Ge was married to a woman for more than 20 years, and has raised a son.

But Tong is gay.

"If I could turn back time, I would never have married a woman," he sighs.

"Even though my wife has forgiven me, I cannot forgive myself, and feel guilty all the time."

Tong says he has been attracted to the same sex since he was a boy. The son of a rich family, Tong was sent to the countryside to learn from farmers during the "cultural revolution" (1966-76).

His best friend, a former classmate, was willing to follow him. No matter how tough the living conditions got, no matter how poor they were, they were always deeply attached to each other.

One day after both had been drinking, they had sex for the first time.

"It had never crossed our mind that we were gay, and also we had no idea how to define our behavior," Tong recalls.

Two years later, his friend was called to the city. It would be the darkest moment in Tong's life - having to say farewell to his first lover...

TIME Magazine's Simon Elegant visits a heaving gay bar in Beijing and is surprised to find that young gay people in China seem to be oblivious to what their predecessors went through:

Xiao Wang, as he is introduced to me, is propped up against a wall in one of the bars. The 29-year-old architect, who sports a discreet stud earring and a fresh razor cut, looks puzzled when I ask him about the drawbacks of being gay in Beijing, whether he gets hassled by the authorities? "Hassled for what? Being gay?" He laughs. "Why would they want to do that?"

There's never been a better time to be gay in China, but as Destination's somewhat schizophrenic combination of outer reserve and inner exuberance demonstrates, it still pays to be careful. Beijing's attitude has been described as a Triple No policy: no approval, no disapproval, no promotion. That hands-off approach — a sort of commercial don't ask, don't tell policy — is emblematic of the delicacy with which the Communist regime is learning to deal with many of the issues concerning personal liberties that are increasingly being raised by its burgeoning middle class. For their part, homosexuals in China seem perfectly happy to pursue their lives within the broad boundaries allowed by the government, albeit not without the occasional snipe at the authorities. It's no coincidence, for example, that the once ubiquitous term tongzhi — comrade — is now only heard as a slang term among young Chinese for gay men...

Meanwhile, Fridae's Dinah Gardner finds out that parents of gay children in China are beginning to not only accept their sexuality but coming together to help other families in the same situation:

...when 18-year-old Zheng Yuantao in the southern Chinese city of Guangzhou told his mother he liked boys, he must have been delighted by her reaction. Wu Youjian didn't cry, introduce him to hot women or disown him. Instead she taught herself how to use a computer, got herself a Sina blog, and put their story online in the hope she could help other gay and lesbian children come out to their parents. In just six months her site had clocked up 100,000 hits and she had earned the affection of hundreds of gays and lesbians who now call her Auntie Wu.

Wu, a writer and editor by profession and a self-confessed liberal, said she found it easy to deal with her son's sexuality because by the time, "Yuantao came out to me… I had read a lot of gay-themed books and movies (by his recommendation). Besides he had also been a good boy in school and in the family; he never made us worried."

And therein lies the key, she says. If you want to come out to your parents do some groundwork first and feed your parents information on what being gay is all about before coming out to them. "Always make sure your parents have some understanding and acceptance of homosexuality before coming out to them," she advises...